Music Video Analysis!
MEANING:
"Everything I Wanted" by Billie Eilish prominently depicts the strong bond between Billie and her brother, Finneas O'Connell. It sheds light on the importance of having someone to lean on in times when one faces difficult challenges, which in Billie's case is 'fame'. She emphasizes that her well-being is ensured by her brother through their close-knit relationship and faith in one another, which helps Billie maintain her sense of self no matter how much fame she achieves. Overall, "Everything I Wanted" is used to express Billie's personal struggles while navigating through fame, highlighting the significance of personal relationships, in times of hardship, and in order to maintain one's sense of identity. Furthermore, the music video enhances the theme of escapism, while also highlighting peace, as she is next to her brother, even amidst a chaotic environment.
LYRICS:
I had a dream
I got everything I wanted
Not what you'd think
And if I'm being honest
It might've been a nightmare
To anyone who might care
Thought I could fly (fly)
So I stepped off the Golden, mm
Nobody cried (cried, cried, cried, cried)
Nobody even noticed
I saw them standing right there
Kinda thought they might care (might care, might care)
I had a dream
I got everything I wanted
But when I wake up, I see
You with me
And you say, "As long as I'm here
No one can hurt you
Don't wanna lie here
But you can learn to
If I could change
The way that you see yourself
You wouldn't wonder why you hear
They don't deserve you"
I tried to scream
But my head was underwater
They called me weak
Like I'm not just somebody's daughter
Coulda been a nightmare
But it felt like they were right there
And it feels like yesterday was a year ago
But I don't wanna let anybody know
'Cause everybody wants something from me now
And I don't wanna let 'em down
I had a dream
I got everything I wanted
But when I wake up, I see
You with me
And you say, "As long as I'm here
No one can hurt you
Don't wanna lie here
But you can learn to
If I could change
The way that you see yourself
You wouldn't wonder why you hear
They don't deserve you"
If I knew it all then would I do it again?
Would I do it again?
If they knew what they said would go straight to my head
What would they say instead?
If I knew it all then would I do it again?
Would I do it again?
If they knew what they said would go straight to my head
What would they say instead?
ANALYSIS:
In a lot of cases, what we may think about often, or more than usual, ends up coming in a dream. As the first line of this song says "I had a dream", Billie is showing how the stress of fame is consuming her thoughts and feelings. Billie's monotonous expression throughout the song depicts depression, how the immense fame she has achieved doesn't bring her happiness. "Not what you'd think", this is directed toward those "fans" who refuse to look beyond her fame and believe that she got everything she wanted.
The scenes seem to be mainly shot on the highway, and in and around a water body. The video makes Finneas an integral part of her visuals and narrative. Billie's brother sits right next to her in the car with a similar expression to herself, however, doesn't move or show abrupt reactions, like a dummy. This shows his trust and faith in her, and vice versa, as he is the only one to provide Billie with the support that is absent from the rest of her family. On the other hand, Billie's depression leads her into making questionable decisions, which in the video is, driving the car into the ocean. However, he holds her hand to show his support even when Billie feels there's no coming out of the situation she's in.
The lighting plays an integral role in creating the atmosphere of the song. There is minimal street lighting along with mainly natural light, in hues of muted blue and purple (cool tones). Blue is usually used to depict sadness and introspection. In terms of the song, the darker blue tones enhance Billie's emotional state i.e. depression and withdrawal from fame. As Billie mentions the occurrence of a dream, the blue also helps to create a dreamlike atmosphere. The low-key lighting casts a soft glow over the scenes which again, adds to the dreamlike vibe.
"Everything I Wanted" by Billie Eilish poignantly captures the themes of familial support, internal struggles, insecurity, and the struggle between public success and private insecurities.
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